Islamic Voice A Monthly English Magazine

MUHARRAM - SAFAR 1424 H
MARCH 2004
Volume 17-03 No : 207

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Our Dialogue


Permissibility of Life Insurance
Son's Responsibility
A Wedding in the Month of Muharram
The Power of Allah's Names

Son's Responsibility

A woman's husband left home without warning and travelled to his home country where he is living now. They were living in the US. The woman first lived with one of her daughters who is unmarried, and then moved in with her other married daughter. However, the woman's sons told her that she could not continue to live there, without a mahram, and insisted that she should go and live with one of them. She chose to live with the one who has least financial responsibilities. But her sons are telling her that they cannot support her. They are demanding that she should offer her house for rent and move into an apartment near her son, using the rent of her house to pay for the apartment and her living expenses. Could you please explain whether her sons are required to support her and should pay her expenses?

A. The first responsibility for that woman's living expenses lies with her husband, but since he has absconded, she should look after herself if she has the wherewithal. If not, her sons are responsible for her. The responsibility is shared by all three. If they are reluctant to undertake it, they could be seriously in error. Whether they are right to demand that she rents her house and move into an apartment near them is something that could only be decided upon having fuller details. Needless to say, if a son looks after his mother, even though she is financially self-sufficient, he stands to earn great reward from God. Such a reward will be realized in this life and in the life to come as well. Therefore, these sons are depriving themselves of much benefit when they refuse to support their mother and want her to provide for herself.

The other aspect of the problem is that of living with her daughter. There is nothing wrong with that, whether she lives with her unmarried daughter or with her married one. In the latter case, she has the mahram, who is her son-in-law. But even without him, she could live with her unmarried daughter if the area is safe. There is no need for her to change town in order to be near her sons. It seems to me that none of her sons wants her to come and live with him. She may be much better off with either of her daughters.

It should be pointed out, however, that the mahram is required to accompany a woman on travel. There are situations when a woman cannot have a mahram where she lives. Suppose that a woman is childless and her husband dies, if she is an only child, she could be easily without a close man relative. She may have to live by herself through force of circumstance. There are other situations which may cause this, as in the case when children immigrate and leave their parents at home. Then if the husband dies, his wife is left alone. There are also cases where a woman's sons are not dutiful and do not look after their aged parents properly. In all such situations, if the community where a woman lives provides assistance, the woman comes to no harm.

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A Wedding in the Month of Muharram

Could you please explain whether any function, particularly weddings, could be held in the month of Muharram, particularly its first 8 or 9 days?

A. Some people hold a notion that it is not permissible to arrange a marriage or make a marriage contract in the month of Muharram, particularly its first ten days. Some extend this to even arranging the waleemah, or the dinner after marriage, in this period. There is nothing in the Qur'an or the Sunnah to confirm this. The Muharram month is the same as the rest of the year. Muslims do not allow any aspect of omen to interfere with their arrangements or plans. They rely on God in all matters, and reliance on God is sufficient to remove any thoughts of bad omen. The Prophet (peace be upon him) in fact spoke against notions of bad omen. They have no substance. Hence, it is perfectly permissible to arrange a marriage in the month of Muharram and also to arrange the waleemah or any other function. In fact marriage can be contracted and organized at any time, except when a person is in the state of consecration, or ihraam, during his pilgrimage or his Umrah. Other than this, there is no restriction.

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ISLAM AND HEALTH

News Community Roundup Editorial Letters to the Editor Community Initiative Globe Watch Event Diary Trends Muslim Perspectives Metro Mail Men, Missions and Machines Muharram Children's Corner Heritage Children's Corner Quran Speaks to You Hadith Fast Farword Special Space Opinion Guidelines Our Dialogue Miscellany Reflections Lessons to Learn Soul Talk Rights and Wrongs View Point Matrimonial
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