Good Communication Falters, When  someone Determined to Misunderstand

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Good Communication Falters, When someone Determined to Misunderstand

DYS workshop participant Mothilal shares
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Good and clear communication doesn’t work with everyone. Especially people who’ve decided your perspective isn’t relevant.

They aren’t open to understanding and accepting your perspective.

Instead, they are committed to misunderstanding you.

There is no convincing that can be done because they’re not going to listen.

Instead of using the conversation to find a middle ground, they’re using it to prove you wrong.

When you can feel this is the energy of an interaction, it’s important to not be swept away in emotion. You want to be conscious of what’s happening.

This will allow you to set a boundary.

A Boundary Sounds Like:
“I see this isn’t going anywhere and we can agree to disagree.”
“I’m going to disengage with this because it feels like I don’t get to share my perspective.”
“I don’t feel good about this conversation, and I think it’s best for us to stop talking about this.”
“I see this differently and am uninterested in debate.”
“I don’t feel comfortable being spoken to this way, so I am going to remove myself.”

Part of maturing emotionally is understanding that you can’t change or control how people behave. If they’re committed to misunderstanding you, they’re likely gaining something from that interaction.

It might be a feeling of power, a feeling of importance, or the control of a narrative. By feeding into this and continuing to try to get them to hear you, you give them more control.

Keep Your Peace
Save your energy and your communication for people who validate what you feel, who care about what’s going on for you, and who are not intent on holding their narrative.

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