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Count Me Out; Let Me be the Women I want to Be!

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In a world where there are always many new movements coming in fashion, we’ve lost track of what is right or wrong and which path to follow. “You’re free to do your own thing,”really though? Or are we just somehow brainwashed into following every new thing that comes up? We are drawn away by the real truth, the reality, and expected to mix in entirely or stand out.
What if I’m someone who wants to find her place but also trying hard to blend with the existing customs. I don’t want to be all out and about like the current generation; I want boundaries and be open to learning and changing for the good. But not at the cost of losing myself, my religion, my beliefs. I should have the freedom to support or discard anything that I do not like or trespasses my faith. Does that make me orthodox?
For example, I support women who have career goals and want to take a walk to the office, but what if my goals are different. I would love to take a walk to the kitchen and serve my dad. Who loves me the most, supports me- I respect him, care for him because he’s a diabetic patient. He needs me as much I need him- does that make me a victim of “Patriarchy”- but I’m also someone who makes sure the men do not treat the women of their house as a slave, and they should share the load. I would teach my son some house chores and how to respect everyone, regardless of their gender. Does this make me a feminist?
I do have goals in life, and I will work hard to achieve them, but I also like cooking and serving the people I love- I’d appreciate it if a man takes care of me, but I would also not completely be dependent on him. I have goals, but I wouldn’t want to be out there and hire someone else to take care of our house while I storm out to take over the world. What if I like to make a favorite dish for my man, and then he helps me clean up? You see, the balance? What if my language of love and care trespasses the rules of feminism? What am I then? I want to have a family, I like cooking, and I want kids. Does this make me a less progressive woman? Am I embracing it all as a victim of Patriarchy? But I enjoy it, and I’m truly happy. To be the woman in the house who would love to walk to the kitchen and manage to do what she loves, does this make me backward or violate other women’s rights who fight to be EQUAL to men?
I know it might make many women out there furious to read this piece of mine who is a victim of Patriarchy and find it hard to make a place of their own. But so do I. It’s hard to be a part of something that I do not want to be. It’s hard to fight for something I do not believe in. My religion gives respect and honour to the women while ‘culture’ discards them. I’m rooting for the women who are in toxic, abusive relationships, and I’m rooting for the rape or acid victims; I’m rooting for the women who are being oppressed but forgive me for not blending in with the wrong ways of proving yourself equal to the men. We’re different, and we have other responsibilities- I’d follow them, the ones set by my religion, not by culture. I can’t walk on the road naked to prove I’m strong and equal to the men, and I won’t remove my hijab not because it’s what I want to follow, it’s because it’s a part of my religion. It’s a choice but also an obligation that I’d love to follow without being ashamed. I’m a woman, and I’m proud to be one – I sympathize with the women who had to go through a lot but not with those who shout at the top of their voices, jump on the bandwagon without knowing the cause. Some things are forbidden in my religion; I will not support it; if that labels me as something, I’ll take it. But will not try to follow the herd to look cool.
That brings me to a conclusion that I wouldn’t follow a movement or any trend but what I feel is right according to my religion, my principles. And yes, I’ll keep my heart and my mind open to different views and opinions. I’ll be open to learning and growing, but while I’m on this path of change and revolution, I’ll not leave the bag of rules and regulations in my religion. Count me out; let me be the woman who I want to be.

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