Sir,
Apropos the article “Break up of marriages” by Syed Tahsin Ahmed (Oct’ 22). Premarital counseling should be made mandatory before the Nikah. Wakf board can issue the direction. Counseling Centres can be established on the premises of the Masjid. Imams and women volunteers can be trained to be counselors. Payment to them can be made from pooled funds that should be collected from the parties counseled on per case basis. This can be an activity of the Wakf board.
Christians have made a two-month premarital Counselling course mandatory failing which some Churches do not conduct the marriage at all. As a consequence, you will hardly find them in courts. But our Muslims are wasting time and resources on marital discords.
Nikhat Abroo Tabassum,
IAS (Retd.), Bangalore
Sir,
Oct/2022 issue of IV carries an article by Syed Tahsin Ahmed titled “Breakup of Marriages”. As it has been noted by the writer, this unpleasant and burning social issue has increased many folds in our community. The writer has rightly put his fingers on the raw nerve of modern society in which girls are much more educated and liberated from the old cultural taboos. They have both worldly knowledge and understand both “Sharia Laws” and “Laws of the Land”. However, men and their families are still living in patriarchal culture without recognizing the significant changes in the newfound liberation of the opposite sex.
The author of this article has gone in depth to fairly fish out all the causes and reasons in general, for the breakup of marriages, in the first two paragraphs.
Nowadays women have become more aggressive as the laws on abusive harassment, dowry and Triple Talaq have become more stringent.
Young men and women consider marriage as the license to indulge in satisfying hormonal desires but fail to understand the enormous responsibilities that come with marriage. More so on the boy than the girl.
The author has rightly pointed out that counseling young men and women should be conducted before the marriage, highlighting the “Husband’s rights over his wife” and “wife’s rights over her husband”.
Having complete knowledge and understanding of the rights and responsibilities of the husband and wife according to Sharia is the key to a successful married life.
Nowadays some wives have become a big bone of discontent. It is just wrongly assumed that the husband has the absolute right to the wife’s income with no questions asked. But that’s also the case according to Sharia law.
DMS Human Rights Foundation programs or similar programs should be part of every community Masjid. In a conservative society like here, it becomes difficult to take this campaign among girls and women.
Nevertheless, it is necessary since many families have been torn apart because of the lack of Islamic knowledge and a lethal combination of “Ego and Pride”.
Qazi Minhaj Azher,
USA
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